Office Space

Last week I officially ended my Ozzie-bonding-daytime-TV-filled days to bring home some bacon, and to finally end the insanity that was my four months of unemployment-filled pregnancy (or pregnancy-filled unemployment, if you will). I was so nervous to start my new job --because no one knew that I was pregnant -- that I was having major acid reflux and horrible nightmares of them giving me dirty looks or worse -- marching me right out of the door. I wasn’t sure what I was going to say, or when I was going to say it. But I knew after I looked at myself in the mirror before I left for work, there was no way that I could hide it. I found it quite funny, actually. Either they will know that I was very, very pregnant or that I liked to eat beach balls for breakfast.

The first day I was mostly in orientation, which I found intriguing. I suppose that this was what it was like to work at a “real” place of business. My orientation class had four people, and of course I was the one who wanted to chat it up with everyone. All of them were straight out of college, and I was the lone pregnant lady. They were all very nice, and laughed at my jokes at the appropriate places. We got tours of the building and various presentations on everything from “how to work voicemail” to “please don’t wear half tops or flip flops.”

As the day progressed I had yet to admit to anyone that I was pregnant. It was very odd. I figured that maybe they thought I liked to eat beach balls. However, at the end of the day, I told my boss (or supervisor as they call it there) that I was pregnant. He said that he didn’t notice. I found that CRAZY. Anyways, everything worked out and everyone is super supportive and nice and it all seems too good to be true. I seriously CANNOT believe that I have a job. I keep thinking that they made a mistake and that they will take away my little swipey card thingy and escort me out of the building. However, until that day I will just keep showing up.